The recent events in Tumbler Ridge, BC have shocked people across the province, the country, and the world. As details start to come out and more information is known, it is natural to feel sadness, hurt, anger, and loss of hope. Even if you don’t feel anything at all, that is typically a byproduct of the shock, and your brain is finding it difficult to process. These are all emotions that surface in the wake of a senseless tragedy, and it is perfectly acceptable to allow yourself to feel these emotions as they come up. In fact, it is arguable that it is necessary, for getting closer to how you’re feeling is a healthy way to work through your grief.
When you feel difficult emotions connected to your grief, remind yourself that they are a product of your empathy, your caring, your heartbreak. You don’t have to be from Tumbler Ridge to feel how you feel, and you needn’t push these feelings down because you might live hundreds or thousands of kilometres away. We are now a nation grieving together, as one. When you grieve, you are part of something bigger than yourself; a thread in a blanket being wrapped around an entire community. There is peace to find in your grief as it binds us together and makes us stronger and more human.
Mister Rogers, the beloved children’s entertainer, had a saying he shared that his mother told him when he was a child and something scary was unfolding on the television: look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping. There has been an influx of helpers offering support, guidance, care, and help both locally as well as around the world. Counsellors have travelled to Tumbler Ridge and surrounding areas to offer their services and support to a community that needs it the most. Words of well wishes have been pouring in from world leaders, from people who have seen the news reports, and from people who have experienced similar tragedies firsthand. That’s what needs to happen after events like these; people come together from all walks of life to protect and heal where needed, and in this case, it is for an entire community.
In the wake of a tragedy, it is important to seek out gratitudes. Finding small pleasures in life can bring balance to some of the heavier thoughts many people are holding right now. A fireplace in your living room offering heat and light, a friend texting to check in with you, a funny video you stumble upon, or your cat cozying up on your legs as it drifts off to sleep. Solace can be found in these moments, so recognize and acknowledge them the best you can. Also, if you are struggling, open up to people in your life you trust. Family, friends, loved ones, and counsellors can offer a listening ear and support you while you work through your feelings. If you need to speak to someone, reach out to Walmsley EFAP and we can connect you with a counsellor.
Rob Baker, CEO, Walmsley EFAP