Self-Esteem
What is Self esteem?
Your self-esteem is made up of thoughts and feelings you have about yourself. These may be positive or negative. For example:
- I'm pretty
- I'm ugly
- I learn from my mistakes
- I'm afraid to fail.
The more positive feelings you have about yourself, the higher your self-esteem. The more negative feelings you have about yourself, the lower your self-esteem. Self-esteem affects the way you live, how you think, act and feel about yourself and others, and how successful you are in achieving your goals in life.
High self-esteem can make you feel effective, productive, capable, and lovable. Low-self-esteem can make you feel ineffective, worthless, incompetent, and unloved.
Self-esteem can be improved. Don't let past failures hold you back. You owe it to yourself to learn to feel good about who you are!
Some Factors That Influence Your Self-Esteem
Your level of self-esteem is based on the unique experiences and personal relationships that have made up your life. These experiences may occur at home, socially, in school, on the job or in society. The relationships that affect your self-esteem may include your parents, spouse, grandparents, siblings, friends, classmates, supervisors, and co-workers.
In general positive experiences and fulfilling relationships help raise self-esteem. Negative experiences and troubled relationships tend to lower self-esteem. No single event or person can determine your level of self-esteem. It develops over time and constantly changes with experience.
The Importance of High Self-Esteem
With high self-esteem you can be the person you want; enjoy others more fully, and; offer more of yourself to the world.
Feeling good about yourself enables you to accept challenges. When you have high self-esteem, you're not afraid to develop your abilities. You're willing to risk trying new things. If you don't try, you can't grow.
It enables you to enrich your life. Happy people are a joy to be around. By being happier with yourself, you'll be eager to meet new friends. By being more comfortable and open about yourself, you'll develop closer relationships.
It will help you be more flexible. Change isn't easy. It's unfamiliar and frightening at times. However, a positive self-image makes it easier to accept new ideas and ways of doing things.
Things You Can Do
- Make it a point to be your own best friend.
- Identify and accept your strengths and weaknesses - everyone has them.
- Take a "can-do" attitude to life. Set a reasonable timetable for reaching personal goals and offer yourself encouragement along the way.
- Take time out regularly to be alone with your thought and feelings. Get involved in activities you can enjoy by yourself, like crafts, reading, or an individual sport. Learn to enjoy your own company.
- Don't overreact to errors. Accept your successes and failures - those who love you do!
- Take pride in your achievements, both great and small.
- Respect yourself. Don't try to be someone else. Be proud of who you are.
- Trust yourself. Pay attention to your thoughts and feelings. Act on what you think is right and listen to your intuition. Do what makes you feel happy and fulfilled.
- Read books on raising your self-esteem.
- Work with a counsellor on self-esteem building activities.
Web Sites and Information
Click here for a list of books on Self-Esteem to consider reading.